Baby Preparation Tips & Suggestions
Becoming a mom is a wonderful experience, but it also means some big changes and there’s a lot to take in. We’ve put together some resources to help you prepare to welcome your new little family member, nurturing her happy healthy development even before she leaves the womb.Find a doctor for your baby You may want to start looking for a pediatrician or family doctor for your baby midway through your pregnancy. That may seem early, but you'll want to give yourself plenty of time to find a physician who will be a good fit for your family – and who is taking new patients and accepts your insurance. Talk to your health insurance provider to find out how to add your baby to your policy, and see which local doctors are covered. Make sure you understand how yourinsurance plan works, especially regarding your benefits for labor, delivery, and maternity care. Get on the same page as your partner Just as it's important talk about how your partner can help you during labor, be sure to discuss what you'll need from each other during the newborn period. Differing expectations can create big conflicts, so try to work this out ahead of time as best you can. Don't assume that your partner knows how much your new baby will turn your lives upside down. Talk about how you'll divide baby and household duties. And educate your partner about less obvious things, like how to support you in breastfeeding. You can also make life easier by hashing out some big decisions now, like what to name your baby, whether to circumcise, how you'll feed your baby, and whether to have a religious ceremony (such as a baptism or baby naming). Talk to veteran moms There are all kinds of things about new motherhood that, for whatever reason, sometimes remain taboo subjects – leaking pee, the baby blues, and diminished sex drive, just to name a few. You won't have the same experience as your friends, but finding out about certain things ahead of time can reduce the shock factor. So ask your mom friends for the real deal. "For example, there's a myth that bonding should happen right away. That's not true for everyone," says Patricia O'Laughlin, a marriage and family therapist at Center for the Psychology of Women in Los Angeles. "Finding honest people who are willing to share their experiences can help you adjust your expectations." But if a friend starts rambling on about her third cousin's rare-but-terrifying labor complication, gently put a stop to it and ask for some helpful suggestions on diaper brands instead. Try the BabyCenter birth clubs for great advice from women in all stages of pregnancy and childrearing. Prepare older siblings – and pets The new baby may rock your older children's world even more than yours. Fortunately, your family has several months to get used to the idea, and there are things you can do to set the stage for a new brother or sister. Many parents use a baby doll to help their child understand what's coming. Older toddlers or preschoolers enjoy the pretend play, and when they see you diapering or feeding the new baby later, it will seem familiar. Some hospitals have sibling classes, where older kids can learn about babies – why they cry, how to keep them safe, and why they sleep so much. "Kids really love this. It makes them feel part of the family," says childbirth educator Randall. As your due date approaches, make sure you've lined up someone to care for your children during the birth and afterward. Pets also benefit from special pre-baby preparation. Local trainers may offer classes, or you can turn to books, articles, or videos for tips on getting your pet used to the new baby. And consider whether you'll need to make arrangements with a pet sitter or dog walker for when you're away from home.
Decide who will attend the birth
This is a very personal decision. Some moms like a full room, including their partner, a doula, a friend or two, their mom, and their mother-in-law present to witness the miracle of birth and provide support. (If you fall into this category, check with the hospital or birthing center to see how many people are allowed.)
Others prefer as few people present as possible. Give some thought to what you want, so that there are no misunderstandings, unwelcome observers, or offended grandmothers.
It can also be helpful to designate a "family spokesperson" ahead of time – that is, someone who can send emails and make phone calls (or spread the news on social networking sites) to let everyone know when your baby arrives.
Finally, remember that labor can be exhausting, and visitors popping by unannounced during your recovery may not make for the most restful experience. Mary Lou Light, mother and baby nurse, recommends limiting the number of visitors. And if it starts to get overwhelming, ask a nurse to act as bouncer.
"I've seen many moms who want to sleep or breastfeed, but they feel impolite asking the visitors to leave. We nurses do it for them," says Light.
